pain

The Rejuvenation of Hope

Aspiration; that’s what floods my concentration.
Elevation; trying to awaken the whole nation.
Infiltration; into the minds of every race and
variations of speech and deliberation.
But one nation is what I preach to the congregation
on every station; Latin, Asian and even Haitian.
Maturation; is what we need for propagation.
A saturation of love with no hesitation.
And this equation is what will end the condemnation
of God’s creation and bring us to that culmination.
Our graduation; into peace. Get in formation.
Our situation calls out for this salutation.
This information is given out with calculations.
That our nation will finally rise to the occasion
and a celebration will be in order for the duration
of procreation, giving birth to inspiration…

~Jah Soul

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My Cry For Mama…

People say that we can never live forever, but forever I will hold you.
Deep within my soul, wish I was there to console you.
My heart sheds many tears and many wounds still remain,
but I understand that God had to steal you from your pain.
Will things ever be the same, without your laughter and your wit?
I bet you’re talking Prince’s ear off, probably giving him a fit.
You were a force to be reckoned with, that we can admit.
But your company was grand, for many hours we could sit.
Ups and downs we experienced and hard roads we traversed.
But I already miss you yelling, “Get my make-up bag out of my purse”.
Strong willed and strong minded, pure power in your essence.
Now I long for the chance to spend an hour in your presence.
But your life is not yet over; it’s time for you to get your wings,
then fly as high as they will take you and let the heavens sing.
Yes, I’m going to miss you mama, that’s a fact that can’t be missed.
But I know God called you home, because you’re the next angel on His list…

~ Jah Soul

The Battle Within

What happens when you lock a man in a cage with rage
flowing through his blood stream?
Doves cry, but have you ever heard a thug scream?
Silohuettes of a shadowless soul.
Hearts no longer beat, they’ve become calloused and cold.
Grab a hold of some narcotics and some counterfeit love.
Don’t judge…
Them lonely nights, you don’t know what it does.
But, above all else you try lovin’ yourself.
While nobody gives a damn about you; yelling for help.
Death is no longer an illusion, the intrusion is real.
This pain will soon or later heal.
That’s a delusion you feel, you turn your spirit into steel.
While emotions deflate, God won’t let you through those gates
with all that anger and hate.
So, quickly meditate and find that balance within.
That humble pie gets mixed in with some malice and sin.
But, then again, whats the use of even fighting the abuse?
That is when your grip gets loose and you call it a truce.
Doing everything you can not to hang yourself in a noose…

~ Jah Soul

Self-Inflicted

I can’t bear it anymore, I can’t… all the anger; all the crying.
All the despair, the hurt, the love… it all has me feeling like I am dyin’
I will not sit here and wonder if you ever loved me.
What I do know, is what I once felt for you, it was intense and deep.
Slowly I burn with frustration and hurt. Knowing I gave it my all
and it still didn’t work…
I needed, I wanted, I prayed and I hoped.
But you took my breath and inhaled it until it made me choke.
Your betrayal laid so heavily on my heart, tore my chest muscles apart.
So overwhelmed, I wanted to die; the scope too big for my life eye.
Thought we would grow old together, but you just faded me, oh how so clever.
Did I expect too much, not noticing our bond fade away?
Or was I in denial then, as I am today?
Answer me! Your silence pains me to my soul.
You think without you, I won’t be whole.
But I will, the decision has been made. My sun will always shine but will
never move in to your shade.
Since you won’t change for the better of us, leave you now I must.
I know that grin sadly, I must with a heavy heart insist.
We must part ways, we can no longer co-exist.
Please go your way and I will be sure to go mine but before you go, allow me to say this just one more time…
Never truly were you ever a Payne; D-Roc, one day, I hope you live up to the name.
Our accomplishments, dreams, goals; you will never destroy, and you ask why?
Thomas DeMont and DeLaune still adore me; me, myself and I…

~ DeVyne Tha Messenjah

Do You Know?

Do you know why this monster lives inside of me?
Why the heathens and the thugs show love and confide in me?
Do you know about the demons that I have evicted from my soul?
Why my heart was frozen cold since I was 12 years old?
Do you know the lies that I faced, how my mom despised my own face,
do you think you can keep pace if my past was retraced?
Do you know why I’m shy, why I’m cool being a loner?
Why I climbed trees to find peace and became a pill-head and a stoner?
Do you see me in my entirety or only pieces of the puzzle?
Do you see why God is the fountain I continuously try to guzzle?
Do you know how I was created and why I really became a beast?
Why I screamed “Fuck the world!” and on friends and enemies I would feast?
Do you know about my struggle, what I fought to overcome?
How I stood and faced the devil and chose not to run?
Do you know the man you married, can you see my hurt and pain?
Or do you only see the sunshine and choose to ignore the rain?
Do you know about all what makes me who I am?
Do you realize the roads I traveled, learning to become a man.
Facing myself in the mirror, for once I am loving who I really am…

~ Jah Soul

Soul Cry

I can’t see it coming down my eyes, so I gotta let my soul cry.
Been accused of so many lies, but I refuse to let my soul die.
So I press on. Even when I trip, I don’t stress long.
Hard-headed brotha, head harder than your chest bone.
Refuse to give in, can’t lose; gotta win.
But they tell me that’s a sin.
Forgive me Lord, I’m going in.
I can’t see it coming down my eyes,
so my pen drops tears every time this ink smears
across my note pad, filled up with sad quips.
Made this paper talk to you like it really had lips.
Nobody knows how this pain flows
through my blood stream, give me some damn morphine.
This is what my blood screams.
I couldn’t see it coming down my eyes
so I cried in my sleep as I let my soul weep…

– Jah Soul

The Caged Bird

The clear sky, sun high
The grass is green, new blossoms spring
Calls of the wild, you are nature’s child
Trapped behind bars, wings stringing old scars
I know how the caged bird feels…
Sitting on the porch, about to go berserk
Dreams ripped away torn
Facing isolation’s scorn
The constant self-doubt, pain within without
He wants to fly, wings clipped; denied
I know how the caged bird feels…
No song, no glee, unable to fly free
He squawks and cries, slowly he dies
Til’ he feels the wind, his wings flex again
He bides his time, freedom on his mind
I know now how the caged bird feels…

-Thomas D. Payne

Your Letter

I wait now…
Every day, every evening for your letter.
Reminiscing…
Your voice, your smile, your hand, your eyes.
Waiting for the officer to say;
“Payne, you have mail to read.”
to ruminate, to laugh, to think…
to contemplate my next reply
but the guard passes my cell.
Now, I’m aching, lonely, waiting, hoping
to hear anything; a joke, a song
an old story about the past.
I wait…
Then, the guard comes back and says,
“Payne, they have you in the wrong cell.”
A letter…
your scent, your smell,
your words at last.
I smile, elated; my day has begun…

– Thomas D. Payne

Dissolute Democracy

Bimbos and reality shows, that’s what they fed out.
Killed all morals and principals. Yeah, they bled out.
This nice little Christian girl became a big slut.
Now she’s badly built with a big gut.
Turned into a “cool” dope addict with a billion dollar habit.
A good girl gone bad; so sad, so tragic.
American dreams turned into hellish illusions.
Hating on one another, caught up in conscious confusion.
We bully the weak while manipulating the meek.
Don’t stop to pray all week, then say it’s Heaven we seek.
What was once mortified is now glorified, daily.
Don’t like what I’m saying, get up on Facebook
and verbally slay me.
Look into the mirror and tell Jah what you see.
But you don’t have to lie to me.
Teachers being laid-off while prison systems flourish.
These athletes are paid millions but whom do they educate and nourish?
Politicians beefing harder than gangsta rappers in the booth.
One nation under God. Is that really the truth?
But, I’m sure I won’t be heard, I’m just a pawn in this game.
We complain about pain, but have no one else to blame…

– Jah Soul

Moments of Motivation

Situations will arise that will put tears in your eyes.

Silent cries to the skies, sing’em like lullabies.

When you rise off your knees, feel the peace that surrounds your inner spirit;

you will know when you feel it. Yeah, that’s the joy that you’ve found.

You’ve been bound to the devil, been a rebel for years,

still trying to shift your life but keep stripping the gears.

It appears it’s all in vain, can’t let go of the game.

Got used to the pain and stopped trying to change.

You’ve been hit with Novocaine, Cocaine and Night Train

taking over your brain, now you can’t feel a thing.

Trying not to go insane…

Damn, your world is so dark,

I see you need a light, so let me give you a spark.

Close your eyes for a second, try to see with your heart.

HE will give you what you need, just keep doing your part.

Start reaching for the stars and climb out of the gutter.

Time to clean up your life; yeah, get rid of that clutter…

– Jah Soul