“In the practice of every way of life and every kind of work, there is a state of mind called that of the deviant. Even if you strive diligently on your chosen path day after day, if your heart is not in accord with it, then even if you think you are on a good path, from the point of view of the straight and true, this is not a genuine path. If you do not pursue a genuine path to its consummation, then a little bit of crookedness in the mind will later turn into a major warp. Reflect on this” this is an excerpt from “The Book of Five Rings” by Miyamoto Musashi-
All of us have stories we have carried around for years about who we are and what we do. Revise and reject any of those currently hampering your progress. Those stories and ideas keep you anchored in the past instead of living in the present.
The more you learn, the more you will challenge those old assumptions. Do not be scared of this, it is okay to let those beliefs from the past go. Once you are able to think from a better perspective, you will see that things you have done in the past was wrong. You will be able to see a positive change in your life. This is called growing up, everything we did in the past was not always correct. We must live and learn. This is a new year and instead of making resolutions we will never keep, it is time we assess our situation and put in the corrections and life style changes necessary to live a happy life.
In the streets, a lot of things get instilled in you; greed, self-preservation, lust, hatred, pain, selfishness…It’s a driving force. It’s hard to change these things, but I have, because I wanted to. Not because anyone else convinced me. My grandparents tried to instill God in my life, it was around me but not in me.
Despite what friends and loved ones want for me, or hope I will achieve, it’s my life and I decide what I will try to make of it. People can plan or hope all they want for those they care about, but in the end, it is each individual who must take responsibility for their own life and make the choice for themselves.
Now is the time when I, as a man, must swallow my pride and admit that I am need of help for the betterment of me alone and not to benefit someone else. My choice is to be a devoted husband, caring father and selfless lover. To be a better man in general, rising above my fears, inadequacies, and inconsistencies.
I have outgrown my worthless, childhood fantasies. Acknowledging my past mistakes, in an honest attempt to do something great. To create a better personality and identity. But, I do thank any and everyone who ever prayed or lent me a helping hand. I heard you, I just wasn’t ready then, but I am now…
– Thomas D. Payne